a slightly more coherent post

Or, as coherent as it can be, seeing as how I'm now a mom of two, of which the oldest has been sick the entire time we've been in Utah - keeping us up at nights, and the youngest of which likes to play! from two! am! until three! or four! - in the morning, people, the morning. Yikes. I'm doing much better with the birthmother thing, and having a closed adoption. Basics: I think God just knew I could not handle a birthmother relationship right now. After we lost the twins, I said I'd never trust a birthmom again. I'm doing much, much better with that, and know I will one day trust a/several birthmom(s). But right now, I needed easy, and God knew that. He wrapped up easy into the most adorable 8 lb 11 oz bundle of lovin' and put it straight into my waiting and eager arms. I've also quickly become ok with this adoption being closed. I have to respect Josh's birthmom, D, and what she wants for her life. This is what she wants. We will respect that fully. I spent some time Monday night with a friend of my aunt's who has adopted six children. It was amazing and wonderful to sit and talk with someone who knows exactly what it's like to be in my shoes. I learned a lot and felt so comfortable with her. On to non-adoption things. How's this for Craziness in it's Purest Form: Nathan and I went house hunting in Utah, land of Death by Chapped Lips - the place I said I'd rather die than move back to. Not that we're moving there, because really, we probably won't. But it's so interesting to see what your money can buy in different places. And in Utah, we would be so much closer to family. Yikes. Wheels are a'spinnin'.